Post by Norris on Jul 10, 2009 7:28:31 GMT -5
(I got a little tired of writing Sonic X stories, so I thought I'd try my hand at The Penguins of Madagascar instead. This story is inspired by a couple of Skilene vids that are circulating on YouTube, so enjoy!)
SCENE ONE
Exterior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, day
The four penguins (SKIPPER, KOWALSKI, RICO and PRIVATE) are gathered around what looks like a laser transmitter made out of a metal sieve, a car battery and several fiddly parts you'd expect to find inside your TV. KOWALSKI is making several adjustments to it whilst the others assist him.
KOWALSKI: Wrench.
One of the penguins passes him a wrench, and KOWALSKI briefly adjusts something before handing it back.
KOWALSKI: Screwdriver.
The same process is repeated.
KOWALSKI: Cologne.
Rico sprays a cloud of cologne out of a small bottle and into KOWALSKI's face. The cologne briefly hangs in the air before KOWALSKI inhales it all.
KOWALSKI: (sighs lightly) Ah, Eau de Hydrocarbon. Just the thing to keep the brain cells functioning!
SKIPPER: How long until that thing's finished, soldier?
KOWALSKI immediately stops and begins to jot down something on his ever-present notebook.
KOWALSKI: (muttering) Let's see. According to my calculations, if I take into account the multiple intervals according to...
Enter MARLENE immediately behind SKIPPER. She is grinning widely (as usual) and waves to the penguins.
MARLENE: (beaming) Hey, guys!
The penguins panic and roll backwards, trying to hide the invention, and raising their flippers in kung-fu style. They relax on seeing MARLENE.
SKIPPER: For crying out loud, Marlene! Why do you only ever visit when we're having a secret meeting?
MARLENE: (unconvinced) Yeah, so if it's such a secret, why are you doing it out here?
KOWALSKI: (looks up from notes) This device has a very low power capability, and by covering its entire surface with solar nanopanels, we can harness the power of the sun to keep its battery permanently charged.
MARLENE: Yeah...can someone say it in English?
PRIVATE: It's solar-powered.
KOWALSKI: (finishes his notes) And according to my notes, Skipper, it should be ready for testing right about...NOW!
He immediately throws a lever on the side of the device, which throws out an ice-blue ray of light that bounces off several of the lampposts around the zoo, ricochets off a hubcap on a zoocart, bounces back from the hour hand on the zoo clock, before finally hitting MARLENE square in the back.
SKIPPER: Marlene! (to others) Get the medic!
As he rushes over to help his friend, the others look at one another, confused.
PRIVATE: Which one of us is the medic?
RICO shrugs his shoulders, confused. Meanwhile, MARLENE is coming around, and SKIPPER is holding his flipper in front of her face.
SKIPPER: Marlene, quick! How many flippers am I holding up?
MARLENE shakes her head as her vision gradually returns to normal. In her eyes, SKIPPER is suddenly surrounded by several giant hearts, and an angelic chorus is playing softly as a warm glow envelopes the penguin.
MARLENE: (smiling widely) Say, Skipper, since when did you become so...so...
SKIPPER: (confused) So so?
MARLENE: (standing up) You know, so...cute?
SKIPPER: (gobsmacked) Cute?! I'm a lean, mean fighting-machine, Marlene! What could possibly be cute about that?
In a sudden movement almost too quick for the eye to see, MARLENE grabs SKIPPER by the sides and edges him backwards, as though they are in a freezeframe of a tango.
MARLENE: Let's just say it's a little something we share.
She growls playfully at him, whilst the other penguins look on, astonished. KOWALSKI begins to flick frantically through his notes.
KOWALSKI: (perplexed) I don't understand it! That machine was only supposed to warm up cold coffee!
MARLENE: (looking up) Coffee! Yeah, that's a good idea! C'mon, Skipper!
Before SKIPPER can even have time to react, MARLENE whisks him away from the other penguins, who watch them leave.
Cut to:
SCENE TWO
Montage sequence
Some upbeat music play as several scenes of the zoo are played out. The first is of MARLENE dragging SKIPPER over to a sewer that passes the zoo. MARLENE dives in, and returns later with a fish for SKIPPER.
The second sequence shows MARLENE and SKIPPER in the Reptile House, with the CHAMELEONS lined up in columns. MARLENE gives a smile at SKIPPER, and then claps her hands. The CHAMELEONS then break formation and form the words "I LOVE U". SKIPPER gives an uncomfortable smile at this.
In the third and final segment, the chimpanzees - MASON and PHIL - are taking pictures of MARLENE and SKIPPER with their digital camera. In each shot they try and take, SKIPPER is seen trying to escape, but MARLENE holds him tightly in her grip, thus stopping the penguin from escaping, whilst MARLENE continues to pull funny faces at the camera in each shot.
SCENE THREE
Interior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, afternoon
KOWALSKI, PRIVATE and RICO are looking over KOWALSKI'S device, when MARLENE suddenly pops up.
MARLENE: (beaming) Hey guys!
The three yelp in fright, but calm down on realising that it's MARLENE.
MARLENE: Have any of you seen Skipper?
PRIVATE: Well, he's just...
RICO slaps PRIVATE over the back of the head to shut him up.
MARLENE: Yeah...well, I just wanted to bring this little present for him.
She holds up a large, heart-shaped cake with pink frosting and white decorations. On the top are the words "MARLENE + SKIPPER". She sets this down on the floor as she turns to leave.
MARLENE: (to penguins) I'm over in my habitat if my little Skippy-Wippy comes back!
She leaves, shutting the door behind her. RICO makes several vomiting noises in disgust at MARLENE's comment. As if in response, SKIPPER suddenly emerges from the television, where he has been hiding all this time.
SKIPPER: (worried) Has she gone?
RICO: (nodding) Uh-huh.
PRIVATE: (gestures to cake) She made you a cake, Skipper.
SKIPPER: Forget about cake, Private! We need to get Kowalski's contraption working pronto! I'm not having anybody calling me "Skippy-Wippy" while I'm around!
KOWALSKI: Skipper, I've been running some tests on our coffee-warming machine, and it turns out that I forgot to carry the two in my calculations. Instead of projecting a thermal beam for the gradual warming of coffee, we have unintentionally created a beam that causes the brain to prematurely release several neurohormones that stimulate the pleasure center of the mammalian brain.
SKIPPER: (raises an eyebrow) Meaning?
KOWALSKI: That our laser is effectively a love potion. I've managed to reverse the beam's polarity to extinguish the neurohormones released prematurely and revert Marlene back to her old self.
SKIPPER: Nice work, Kowalski. But, err, why didn't you just zap her when you had the chance?
KOWALSKI: Because the battery was in the wrong way round, Skipper.
SKIPPER: (to Rico) Rico?
RICO gives KOWALSKI a firm slap over the head. KOWALSKI shakes his head, blubbering incoherently, before moving back to SKIPPER.
KOWALSKI: There is only one problem, Skipper. We have to give Marlene another dose without her suspecting a thing. In no way can her brain become too stimulated, or we may end up destroying her mind.
Some ominous music plays for a few seconds as we see the reactions on all of their faces.
SKIPPER: That's easy, soldier, we make sure Marlene doesn't know we're about to scramble her brains, and I think I know the way to do it...
Cut to:
SCENE FOUR
Interior shot, the Otter Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, morning
MARLENE is busy dusting and humming joyfully to herself, walking in a semicircle around the room with the feather-duster in her paw. The sewer-hatch at the centre of her den flies off, and SKIPPER emerges. He turns his head around so that he is facing MARLENE, who smiles widely and stretches out her arms at the sight of him.
MARLENE: (ecstatically) Skippy!
SKIPPER: (climbing out of the sewer) OK, Marlene, we need to... (eye widen) Sweet Fiorello La Guardia!
Taking up most of the back wall of the den is a collage of pieces of garbage, stray bits of paper etc. that have been arranged into a likeness of SKIPPER'S face. Below this are the photographs taken of MARLENE and SKIPPER seen earlier, along with two scented candles that are burning softly.
MARLENE: (proudly) Isn't it great? I went through every garbage can in the zoo to make this, my little Skippy-Wippy! Ain't it cute?
SKIPPER looks toward the entrance of MARLENE'S den, where KOWALSKI, RICO and PRIVATE are positioned and ready. KOWALSKI silently gestures for SKIPPER to go ahead.
SKIPPER: (half-heartedly) Err, yeah, it's...adorable.
MARLENE: (hugging Skipper tightly) And d'you know what else is better? (points to candles) Those two scented candles I got from the zoo gift shop! You don't even notice the smell of the garbage with those!
The scent of one of the candles reaches SKIPPER, who coughs on the scent as his eyes water.
SKIPPER: (coughs) What is that smell?
MARLENE: Eau de L'Amour. (seductively) Just the thing for love.
SKIPPER: (feeling uncomfortable) Err, Marlene, can't we just...
In another swift movement, SKIPPER is again swept off his feet and into the arms of the lovestruck otter, who holds him tightly as she gazes into the eyes of the terrified penguin.
MARLENE: Enough small talk, my little Skippy! Kiss me, you fool!
She puckers her lips, which is more than enough to send SKIPPER into a panic.
SKIPPER: (shrieks) KOWALSKI!
The remaining three penguins burst in, and KOWALSKI fires his device point-blank at MARLENE before she can plant a kiss on SKIPPER'S beak. MARLENE collapses, releasing SKIPPER, who falls to the floor, dazed.
PRIVATE: (to Skipper) Skipper, are you OK?
SKIPPER: (getting to his feet) Never better, Private.
PRIVATE: Only, we heard you scream.
SKIPPER: (slaps Private) It was a call for back-up, Private. I never scream.
They move over to MARLENE, who is coming round from the blast. KOWALSKI is already checking her over whilst RICO watches.
KOWALSKI: Marlene? Can you hear us?
MARLENE'S vision returns to her, and all she can see are the four penguins.
MARLENE: (weakly) Uhh...What just happened? And why does my habitat smell like cheap perfume?
SKIPPER: (to penguins) Mission accomplished, men. High five!
They all begin slapping one another whilst MARLENE gets to her feet, still puzzled.
MARLENE: Look, will someone please tell me what's going on?
SKIPPER: Negatory, Marlene. It's too hideous an event to describe! (to penguins) Let's go, boys!
The penguins leave MARLENE to her thoughts as she scratches her head, having difficulty remembering everything.
Cut to:
SCENE FIVE
Exterior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, day
The four penguins can be seen relaxing on deckchairs. RICO is even sporting a pair of sunglasses as they kick back.
SKIPPER: Good work today, men, you saved me from a fate worse than death.
PRIVATE: (confused) But Marlene's a good friend, Skipper.
SKIPPER: I'm not talking about Marlene, Private. I'm talking about Love - the one thing that can make you let your guard down when you least expect it!
KOWALSKI: Well, Skipper, we needn't worry about that again. I threw it in the garbage as a dead loss.
There is a flash of ice-blue light behind them, and the penguins lean forward. On the main walkway of the zoo can be seen MAURICE running away and screaming. Following after him, machine in hand, is KING JULIEN, grinning broadly.
JULIEN: Come back, Maurice! I just want to be hugging and kissing you!
Cut to end credits
THE END
SCENE ONE
Exterior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, day
The four penguins (SKIPPER, KOWALSKI, RICO and PRIVATE) are gathered around what looks like a laser transmitter made out of a metal sieve, a car battery and several fiddly parts you'd expect to find inside your TV. KOWALSKI is making several adjustments to it whilst the others assist him.
KOWALSKI: Wrench.
One of the penguins passes him a wrench, and KOWALSKI briefly adjusts something before handing it back.
KOWALSKI: Screwdriver.
The same process is repeated.
KOWALSKI: Cologne.
Rico sprays a cloud of cologne out of a small bottle and into KOWALSKI's face. The cologne briefly hangs in the air before KOWALSKI inhales it all.
KOWALSKI: (sighs lightly) Ah, Eau de Hydrocarbon. Just the thing to keep the brain cells functioning!
SKIPPER: How long until that thing's finished, soldier?
KOWALSKI immediately stops and begins to jot down something on his ever-present notebook.
KOWALSKI: (muttering) Let's see. According to my calculations, if I take into account the multiple intervals according to...
Enter MARLENE immediately behind SKIPPER. She is grinning widely (as usual) and waves to the penguins.
MARLENE: (beaming) Hey, guys!
The penguins panic and roll backwards, trying to hide the invention, and raising their flippers in kung-fu style. They relax on seeing MARLENE.
SKIPPER: For crying out loud, Marlene! Why do you only ever visit when we're having a secret meeting?
MARLENE: (unconvinced) Yeah, so if it's such a secret, why are you doing it out here?
KOWALSKI: (looks up from notes) This device has a very low power capability, and by covering its entire surface with solar nanopanels, we can harness the power of the sun to keep its battery permanently charged.
MARLENE: Yeah...can someone say it in English?
PRIVATE: It's solar-powered.
KOWALSKI: (finishes his notes) And according to my notes, Skipper, it should be ready for testing right about...NOW!
He immediately throws a lever on the side of the device, which throws out an ice-blue ray of light that bounces off several of the lampposts around the zoo, ricochets off a hubcap on a zoocart, bounces back from the hour hand on the zoo clock, before finally hitting MARLENE square in the back.
SKIPPER: Marlene! (to others) Get the medic!
As he rushes over to help his friend, the others look at one another, confused.
PRIVATE: Which one of us is the medic?
RICO shrugs his shoulders, confused. Meanwhile, MARLENE is coming around, and SKIPPER is holding his flipper in front of her face.
SKIPPER: Marlene, quick! How many flippers am I holding up?
MARLENE shakes her head as her vision gradually returns to normal. In her eyes, SKIPPER is suddenly surrounded by several giant hearts, and an angelic chorus is playing softly as a warm glow envelopes the penguin.
MARLENE: (smiling widely) Say, Skipper, since when did you become so...so...
SKIPPER: (confused) So so?
MARLENE: (standing up) You know, so...cute?
SKIPPER: (gobsmacked) Cute?! I'm a lean, mean fighting-machine, Marlene! What could possibly be cute about that?
In a sudden movement almost too quick for the eye to see, MARLENE grabs SKIPPER by the sides and edges him backwards, as though they are in a freezeframe of a tango.
MARLENE: Let's just say it's a little something we share.
She growls playfully at him, whilst the other penguins look on, astonished. KOWALSKI begins to flick frantically through his notes.
KOWALSKI: (perplexed) I don't understand it! That machine was only supposed to warm up cold coffee!
MARLENE: (looking up) Coffee! Yeah, that's a good idea! C'mon, Skipper!
Before SKIPPER can even have time to react, MARLENE whisks him away from the other penguins, who watch them leave.
Cut to:
SCENE TWO
Montage sequence
Some upbeat music play as several scenes of the zoo are played out. The first is of MARLENE dragging SKIPPER over to a sewer that passes the zoo. MARLENE dives in, and returns later with a fish for SKIPPER.
The second sequence shows MARLENE and SKIPPER in the Reptile House, with the CHAMELEONS lined up in columns. MARLENE gives a smile at SKIPPER, and then claps her hands. The CHAMELEONS then break formation and form the words "I LOVE U". SKIPPER gives an uncomfortable smile at this.
In the third and final segment, the chimpanzees - MASON and PHIL - are taking pictures of MARLENE and SKIPPER with their digital camera. In each shot they try and take, SKIPPER is seen trying to escape, but MARLENE holds him tightly in her grip, thus stopping the penguin from escaping, whilst MARLENE continues to pull funny faces at the camera in each shot.
SCENE THREE
Interior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, afternoon
KOWALSKI, PRIVATE and RICO are looking over KOWALSKI'S device, when MARLENE suddenly pops up.
MARLENE: (beaming) Hey guys!
The three yelp in fright, but calm down on realising that it's MARLENE.
MARLENE: Have any of you seen Skipper?
PRIVATE: Well, he's just...
RICO slaps PRIVATE over the back of the head to shut him up.
MARLENE: Yeah...well, I just wanted to bring this little present for him.
She holds up a large, heart-shaped cake with pink frosting and white decorations. On the top are the words "MARLENE + SKIPPER". She sets this down on the floor as she turns to leave.
MARLENE: (to penguins) I'm over in my habitat if my little Skippy-Wippy comes back!
She leaves, shutting the door behind her. RICO makes several vomiting noises in disgust at MARLENE's comment. As if in response, SKIPPER suddenly emerges from the television, where he has been hiding all this time.
SKIPPER: (worried) Has she gone?
RICO: (nodding) Uh-huh.
PRIVATE: (gestures to cake) She made you a cake, Skipper.
SKIPPER: Forget about cake, Private! We need to get Kowalski's contraption working pronto! I'm not having anybody calling me "Skippy-Wippy" while I'm around!
KOWALSKI: Skipper, I've been running some tests on our coffee-warming machine, and it turns out that I forgot to carry the two in my calculations. Instead of projecting a thermal beam for the gradual warming of coffee, we have unintentionally created a beam that causes the brain to prematurely release several neurohormones that stimulate the pleasure center of the mammalian brain.
SKIPPER: (raises an eyebrow) Meaning?
KOWALSKI: That our laser is effectively a love potion. I've managed to reverse the beam's polarity to extinguish the neurohormones released prematurely and revert Marlene back to her old self.
SKIPPER: Nice work, Kowalski. But, err, why didn't you just zap her when you had the chance?
KOWALSKI: Because the battery was in the wrong way round, Skipper.
SKIPPER: (to Rico) Rico?
RICO gives KOWALSKI a firm slap over the head. KOWALSKI shakes his head, blubbering incoherently, before moving back to SKIPPER.
KOWALSKI: There is only one problem, Skipper. We have to give Marlene another dose without her suspecting a thing. In no way can her brain become too stimulated, or we may end up destroying her mind.
Some ominous music plays for a few seconds as we see the reactions on all of their faces.
SKIPPER: That's easy, soldier, we make sure Marlene doesn't know we're about to scramble her brains, and I think I know the way to do it...
Cut to:
SCENE FOUR
Interior shot, the Otter Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, morning
MARLENE is busy dusting and humming joyfully to herself, walking in a semicircle around the room with the feather-duster in her paw. The sewer-hatch at the centre of her den flies off, and SKIPPER emerges. He turns his head around so that he is facing MARLENE, who smiles widely and stretches out her arms at the sight of him.
MARLENE: (ecstatically) Skippy!
SKIPPER: (climbing out of the sewer) OK, Marlene, we need to... (eye widen) Sweet Fiorello La Guardia!
Taking up most of the back wall of the den is a collage of pieces of garbage, stray bits of paper etc. that have been arranged into a likeness of SKIPPER'S face. Below this are the photographs taken of MARLENE and SKIPPER seen earlier, along with two scented candles that are burning softly.
MARLENE: (proudly) Isn't it great? I went through every garbage can in the zoo to make this, my little Skippy-Wippy! Ain't it cute?
SKIPPER looks toward the entrance of MARLENE'S den, where KOWALSKI, RICO and PRIVATE are positioned and ready. KOWALSKI silently gestures for SKIPPER to go ahead.
SKIPPER: (half-heartedly) Err, yeah, it's...adorable.
MARLENE: (hugging Skipper tightly) And d'you know what else is better? (points to candles) Those two scented candles I got from the zoo gift shop! You don't even notice the smell of the garbage with those!
The scent of one of the candles reaches SKIPPER, who coughs on the scent as his eyes water.
SKIPPER: (coughs) What is that smell?
MARLENE: Eau de L'Amour. (seductively) Just the thing for love.
SKIPPER: (feeling uncomfortable) Err, Marlene, can't we just...
In another swift movement, SKIPPER is again swept off his feet and into the arms of the lovestruck otter, who holds him tightly as she gazes into the eyes of the terrified penguin.
MARLENE: Enough small talk, my little Skippy! Kiss me, you fool!
She puckers her lips, which is more than enough to send SKIPPER into a panic.
SKIPPER: (shrieks) KOWALSKI!
The remaining three penguins burst in, and KOWALSKI fires his device point-blank at MARLENE before she can plant a kiss on SKIPPER'S beak. MARLENE collapses, releasing SKIPPER, who falls to the floor, dazed.
PRIVATE: (to Skipper) Skipper, are you OK?
SKIPPER: (getting to his feet) Never better, Private.
PRIVATE: Only, we heard you scream.
SKIPPER: (slaps Private) It was a call for back-up, Private. I never scream.
They move over to MARLENE, who is coming round from the blast. KOWALSKI is already checking her over whilst RICO watches.
KOWALSKI: Marlene? Can you hear us?
MARLENE'S vision returns to her, and all she can see are the four penguins.
MARLENE: (weakly) Uhh...What just happened? And why does my habitat smell like cheap perfume?
SKIPPER: (to penguins) Mission accomplished, men. High five!
They all begin slapping one another whilst MARLENE gets to her feet, still puzzled.
MARLENE: Look, will someone please tell me what's going on?
SKIPPER: Negatory, Marlene. It's too hideous an event to describe! (to penguins) Let's go, boys!
The penguins leave MARLENE to her thoughts as she scratches her head, having difficulty remembering everything.
Cut to:
SCENE FIVE
Exterior shot, the Penguin Enclosure, Central Park Zoo, day
The four penguins can be seen relaxing on deckchairs. RICO is even sporting a pair of sunglasses as they kick back.
SKIPPER: Good work today, men, you saved me from a fate worse than death.
PRIVATE: (confused) But Marlene's a good friend, Skipper.
SKIPPER: I'm not talking about Marlene, Private. I'm talking about Love - the one thing that can make you let your guard down when you least expect it!
KOWALSKI: Well, Skipper, we needn't worry about that again. I threw it in the garbage as a dead loss.
There is a flash of ice-blue light behind them, and the penguins lean forward. On the main walkway of the zoo can be seen MAURICE running away and screaming. Following after him, machine in hand, is KING JULIEN, grinning broadly.
JULIEN: Come back, Maurice! I just want to be hugging and kissing you!
Cut to end credits
THE END