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Post by Norris on Jul 8, 2008 0:04:51 GMT -5
yeah, u ever seen a movie called a matter of life and death? great movie classic! anyways if you have this guys sounds like the prosacucion guy in heven lol Nope, that's a new one on me. But I think I see what you're getting at.
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Post by Norris on Jul 8, 2008 5:43:10 GMT -5
And here's some more proof of Grasse's lunacy. On Amazon.co.uk, his book is rating a meagre 1 1/2 stars out of 5: www.amazon.co.uk/review/product/1594741735/ref=cm_cr_dp_all_helpful?%5Fencoding=UTF8&coliid=&showViewpoints=1&colid=&sortBy=bySubmissionDateDescendingAnd almost every review I have read so far has been completely scathing, to the point where my criticisms seem mild by comparison. Here's just three of the reviews I've picked out of the 29 on the site: The way Grasse pokes at the British through his 'Star Spangled Glasses' is amazing. I bought this expecting some humerous quips about our admittedly sometimes jaded past , instead it's just a bunch of childish pops at England . Iraq is our fault , Communist China is our fault due to 'giving Karl Marx his first job'. Every issue of course solved by Team America wading in to sort it out heroically. As for Rimbaud adding his support for this buffoon and his views 'Fight War Not Wars'. Remember that famous Crass lyric Penny ? Obviously not. The best thing for this book is to use it on one of Grasses favoutite evenings, our English 'celebration' of terrorists , Guy Fawkes night and use it to kindle the flames with an effigy of him on top.
Avoid this at all costs.And another one: I can grant the author some repsite on the fact that he has raised some valid and true points in regard to Britain's contribution to climate change, provoking Osama Bin Laden and general imperialism among other things.
The major fault of the book is that it seems to focus more on the author's opinions on certain British customs (some of them being little more than stereotypes, which I'll point out later) rather than how it has ruined the world. The list is far too long to put here, so I'll pick out but a handful of examples.
*How exactly is Brtitain's lack of worship toward Hip-Hop culture a way of ruining world?
*I couldnt believe it when I saw it, but there were chapters devoted to criticizing Britain's afternoon tea breaks and monarch worship. This is just laughable. Again, I must ask, how these ruin the world? Secondly, they're based on nothing more than caricatures of Britain. Ask any British person today what their opinions on the royal family are, and I'd guarantee the majority would be negative. Plus, the concept of an afternoon tea break is something left behind along with the colonial days. Trust me, I've lived in this country all my life, along with many others I've met who've found the concept hilarious.
*The author goes on the criticise Britain on the charge that while South America and China where building temples and pyramids, the Celts were building little more than erected stone blocks. How is retarded architectural development a crime? And how does it ruin the world? By that logic, we should condemn the majority of African and Native North American cultures as well.
*As another poster pointed out, he also has the gall the criticise Britain for having lower casualties on D-day than American servicemen. I know plenty of WWII veterans who would find this claim to be nothing short of evil. So now we have to judge the contribution of a nation at war by how many deaths it suffers.
*He implies that he supports the war on terror, yet hypocritically condemns Britain for inventing the machine gun.
The book had potential, but the end result is little more than opinionated garbage. My personal theory is that rather than having FOUND 101 ways Britain ruined the world, he SET OUT to find 101 ways, ran out of charges, then decided to add some more based on his personal views on certain customs, no matter how ridiculous.
Doubtlessly, the author would point out that I am confirming his idea that Brits are "Difficult Listeners" unable to take any criticism on their country's history. Well, maybe if he practised what he preached on the title rather than degenerate into a desperate, internet teenager's rant based on stereotypes and opinions labelled as facts, I would have gladly reccomended it to fellow countrymen.And the third one from somebody in Glasgow. From a Scottish point of view, I say that if you are going to be snide about the English you can at least try to do so with a bit of wit and humour (not that we Scots, of course, are particlulary noted for either). The amazing thing about Americans is that they really do believe their own founding fanasy, a fantasy no one else is buying - the 'shining city on a hill' of Ronald Reagan - yeah, right. The truth is that if the American rebellion had failed, American blacks would have been freed a lot sooner, the Indians would have been treated a lot better and North America would be one big Canada - an advance for civilisation.On the actual American Amazon site, the reviews are no better, with only 2 stars out of 5: www.amazon.com/review/product/1594741735/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?%5Fencoding=UTF8&showViewpoints=1There are only 13 reviews on the American site, and to avoid making this page any bigger, I'll restrict myself to just one review from this site: First, I'm an American whose husband is from one of the former British colonies. I was all up for a book on some of the horrors perpetrated on the former colonies. Unfortunately, the few real examples of evil the author includes in the book are completely undone by his lack of knowledge of either the English language, basic geography or any semblance of logical arguments. Example: he refers to England and the other three "islands" of the United Kingdom. He seems to think that England was the home of the first university and the first national taxation system. The book is also filled with bad punctuation and mis-spellings (in either American or British versions of the language). Rather than learning anything about British history, what I learned is that Mr. Grasse thinks George Bush is not an idiot, that Mr. Grasse probably never went to college and is proud of it, that he is a born-again Christian who knows nothing of church history, and that he was terribly offended when no one talked about the third-rate movie (Bikini Bandits) he debuted at a small-time film festival in the UK because they were too busy talking about Iraq. The only reason to buy this book is to vicariously explore the psyche of an outwardly egotistical, obviously under-educated person with deep underlying feelings of inferiority.
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Post by wildgoose on Jul 8, 2008 7:42:15 GMT -5
well if Americans are saying that about the book then it says it all realy
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Post by Norris on Jul 8, 2008 8:55:01 GMT -5
Actually, the bulk of the American reviewers were saying that the book was funny, but with the 2/5 rating, I think that they're probably the supporters of Grasse in the International Coalition of British Reparations who are wasting everybody's time and making their fellow countrymen look like maniacs.
I have some more claims against Grasse here (along with the real facts), thanks to the Amazon reviews and to sonicheroes4ever for pointing these ones out to me:
NUMBER TWENTY-SIX - Honours
GRASSE: The British Empire ruined the world by giving Elton John a Knighthood
TRUTH: This is one of the most absurd claims Grasse has made, and has no foundation whatsoever, as the peerage of Sir Elton John and the British Empire can hardly be connected, especially as Elton John was knighted in 1995, long after the British Empire had practically ceased to exist. It is also an unwritten law in every country that no award can be given for any political, social, or sexual bias, so why this is a case of England "ruining" the world is beyond me.
NUMBER TWENTY-SEVEN - Music
GRASSE: The British ruined music with the band Coldplay
TRUTH: Coldplay is just one of many alternative rock bands that appeared in the 1990's. The Alternative rock movement began in the United States in the 1980's, one of the first recognizable alternative rock bands being American groups such as R.E.M, The Feelies and and Violent Femmes. Grasse here seems to be combining his xenophobia with his musical tastes to try and slander the British once again.
NUMBER TWENTY-EIGHT - Sport
GRASSE: The British invented football / soccer to express their violence
TRUTH: Association football (or soccer) began in the form we know in England in 1863 following the founding of the Football Association due to the efforts of Ebenezer Cobb Morley, but had developed from the game of Cuju played in China in c.300 BC. The "violence" of the game is due to overzealous fans of the game and not the players themselves.
NUMBER TWENTY-NINE - The Machine Gun
GRASSE: The British invented the Machine Gun and sold it to Mafia Gangsters, Terrorists etc.
TRUTH: The earliest form of machine gun was the Gatling Gun, invented by the Americans in 1862. The first British machine-gun was the Maxim machine gun, invented in 1884 by American-born Sir Hiram Maxim. There is a 22-year difference between the models, and suggests that Grasse has not even researched this topic at all.
NUMBER THIRTY - Communism
GRASSE: The British are responsible for World Communism because they gave Karl Marx his first job
TRUTH: With allegiances with both the far-right (Nazis) and far-left (Communists), Grasse seems to think that Britain has no fixed alliance at all, and his head is spinning in so many directions that it's hard to tell what he really thinks of Great Britain. Karl Marx himself actually had been in self-employment long before he arrived in England in 1849. Whilst studying at the University of Bonn in 1835, he served as the president of the Trier Tavern Club, and in c.1839, Marx was employed as a poet, becoming a socialist philosopher by 1841, which led to his dissertation from the University of Jena in the same year.
NUMBER THIRTY-ONE - World War Two
GRASSE: The British didn't fight very hard in WWII because their casualty list at D-Day was smaller than that of the Americans
TRUTH: Such a claim is the most disrespectful of them all. Now, it seems, that wars are won by the total dead, and the total 11,000 dead as part of Operation Overlord are just figures to Grasse's twisted mind. D-Day was a joint expedition by both Britain and America, the former of which had been fighting long before America entered the war in 1941. The Battle of Britain in 1940, the bombing of Dresden in 1945 and the Battle of France in 1940 are proof enough of British dedication to the war, and if there is anybody truly evil here, then it is Grasse who considers the life of a soldier to be completely worthless.
NUMBER THIRTY-TWO - Entertainment
GRASSE: The British have no taste in films
TRUTH: Grasse seems to take umbrage at the fact that his independant movie, "Bikini Bandits" (released 2002) had little fanfare when released in Britain in 2003 due to concerns over Iraq. In the grand scheme of all things, a third-rate independant film that rates no higher than 4.2 / 10 on the IMDB is not as important as world politics. As for British cinema, it seems that the likes of "Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines" (1965), "Monty Python's Life of Brian" (1979) and "Shaun of the Dead" (2004) are nothing to Grasse, who for a "director of many famous independant movies" as he bills himself, is an inexperienced oik whose experience is limited to just two independant movies released two years apart.
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Post by wildgoose on Jul 8, 2008 15:34:40 GMT -5
NUMBER THIRTY-ONE - World War Two GRASSE: The British didn't fight very hard in WWII because their casualty list at D-Day was smaller than that of the Americans TRUTH: Such a claim is the most disrespectful of them all. Now, it seems, that wars are won by the total dead, and the total 11,000 dead as part of Operation Overlord are just figures to Grasse's twisted mind. D-Day was a joint expedition by both Britain and America, the former of which had been fighting long before America entered the war in 1941. The Battle of Britain in 1940, the bombing of Dresden in 1945 and the Battle of France in 1940 are proof enough of British dedication to the war, and if there is anybody truly evil here, then it is Grasse who considers the life of a soldier to be completely worthless. for that comment alone i would like to rape his entire family
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Post by Norris on Jul 9, 2008 0:51:54 GMT -5
As I said in my evaluation: the only evil one here is Grasse.
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Post by Norris on Aug 3, 2008 0:00:56 GMT -5
Just a quickie, guys and girls.
My computer is now prepared, and I'm continuing with my book. So far, 79 of the 101 arguments are out of the way, and I'm researching a couple of topics for the final stretch.
Besides that, I'm proofreading what I've written to far, to make sure that the jokes are all there. As a parody, I don't want it to appear too dark.
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Post by wildgoose on Aug 3, 2008 16:38:39 GMT -5
cool good luck with it!
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Post by Norris on Aug 3, 2008 23:46:58 GMT -5
Thanks, I think I may need it. ;D
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Post by Norris on Sept 1, 2008 10:54:02 GMT -5
Woohoo!
I'm pleased to announce that The Sinister Civilisation: 101 Ways that Atlantis Ruined the World is finally finished! ;D
If anyone wants a copy, just e-mail me and I'll send a copy to you before I send it off to the publishers in London.
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Post by wildgoose on Sept 1, 2008 17:50:35 GMT -5
good luck with that!
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Post by Norris on Sept 2, 2008 0:18:13 GMT -5
Thanks, Goose! Now that that's out of the way, I'm working on my next two literary ventures: - Completely Stoned - A comedy set in Stone Age Africa
- Space Bloopers - A parody of the sci-fi genre in general
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